Another caveat is within gender differences. Jane*, from New York, who identifies as lesbian and wants to remain anonymous, finds that as her partner is a woman, she’s often more welcome into social plans than partners who are men. “With my queer friends, the lines are often blurred and there is less of a gender dichotomy so partners joining doesn’t feel like a big deal. With my straighter groups of friends, I find that we are all a little more intentional about hanging out without partners, but my wife is almost always invited as well because she’s a woman. I don’t mind this, but I do have to set that boundary sometimes and have a friends-only hang.” When it comes to interacting with her friends’ partners, she feels depending on the person, the environment can completely change. “If the partner in question likes to dominate conversations or has different political views, I can find myself dampening down my personality or watching my words more closely, which can be exhausting,” she says. With one particular friend, she now sees her “a little less”, partly because she’s not a fan of their partner, who often is brought along unless a friends-only meet is specifically discussed.
Source link
