The star of the rehearsal dinner—minus the couple, of course—is the food. When choosing your catering, have some fun with the selection and embrace your inner foodie. “This is the time to potentially have a much more playful menu,” says Carter. “When we do a food tasting for your wedding day, sometimes there are menu options that get left behind. A rehearsal dinner is a great place to highlight some of the options that you might have had at a tasting that didn't make the final cut, but that you are still really delighted to share with your family and friends.” She also suggests selecting some unique catering options like food trucks or a clambake if it fits with your venue.
Most rehearsal dinners are formal seated dinners with a coursed-out meal. Yet this formality doesn’t have to translate into stuffiness. “Rehearsal dinners offer the opportunity to entertain the way you might at home, given the intimate guest count,” explains Easton. “Seated dinners can really create an atmosphere that feels personal. Think about using intentionally narrow tables to encourage convivial conversation, and select strong tabletop pieces that look like they came straight from your party pantry.” You also can have meals served family style to encourage a more engaging environment among guests. “Be sure to ask your caterer what the best dish is for a group of your size,” she adds.
As for the look of your event, don’t feel like you have to mirror the aesthetic of the big day. “The rehearsal dinner is a great way for you to flex and get out some of that creative energy you couldn't place within your wedding day, but you are still really excited to show off,” advises Carter. She says you can choose a different palette and embrace an original theme for the party. However, don’t be afraid to use that monogram from your invitation suite. “Similar to a marketing approach for a restaurant or hotel group, we like to have subtle ‘branding’ moments tucked in throughout the weekend that weave a common thread between each party,” shares Easton.
Another way to shape the environment of your event is with music. Curate a playlist for the dinner that will create the ideal ambiance for the scene. “Conversation is great, but sometimes having a little bit of background music is lovely,” says Carter. While you can connect your playlist to a speaker system, the planner shares that bringing in a live performer like an acoustic guitarist can add a beautiful touch.
Who Pays for the Rehearsal Dinner
According to wedding tradition, the groom’s family will take care of the rehearsal dinner budget and planning. Of course, times have changed and the norms of who pays for a wedding have changed greatly. Today, any side of the family could offer to pay for the event, both parents of the couple may split costs, or the couple may pay for it themselves. Just make sure your guests aren't footing the bill.
Is It Necessary to Have a Rehearsal Dinner
While rehearsal dinners aren’t a required step in the process of getting legally married, it is one of the most classic parts of the Western wedding tradition. If it doesn’t feel right for your wedding, you can skip hosting one, but it can be a wonderful opportunity to kick off your celebrations and spread speeches for the weekend over multiple days.
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