In my real life, my friends couldn’t hide their shock and confusion when I told them my mom’s age. And among my extended family, there were whispers about my parents that followed me around. Once, someone told me, “It’s a shame your parents had you so young and aren’t together. You never grew up around true love.” But I’m not an outlier; in 2008, the year I turned 11, 64% of children under 18 lived with both parents, down 23 percentage points from 1960. Even more, parents not being together doesn’t mean they love their children any less. It means, like with many separations, that it was healthier for them to be apart than together, and recognizing that is an act of both self-love and familial love. My parents’ romantic relationship didn’t work out, but they remain in each others’ lives, as co-parents, because of me. That, to me, is love in its purest form.
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